Notes:


I'm back. Looking forward to connecting with many of you. However, I'm not sure if Father would have me continue this next chapter here or write a new one. Either way, I hope you will journey with me into the next phase with Jesus Christ through the guidance of the Holy Spirit.


Saturday, May 9, 2009

Motherhood Privilege

As I reflect on my motherhood experiences, there were many hurtful moments because I didn’t appreciate my position as a mother. My love and my care for my children were genuine. But, I was overwhelmed with responsibilities with little understandings from others. I felt I was constantly misunderstood, mistaken, and mistreated. The harder I tried to be a good mother and wife, the more I felt less of me. I lost myself in the midst of motherhood and joy was nowhere in sight. I cried many times in front of my children and alone in my bathroom.

I called out to my Father in desperation and He answered me by changing me. He transformed my mind and my thoughts to look at my children and husband through His eyes. And, I saw love, patience, self-control, kindness, gentleness, joy, goodness, and faithfulness blooming around me. I cried alone, but this time with joy.

Along with joy came the response ability which enabled me to cling onto my Father and little by little, I found myself faintly reappearing and the dark cloud quietly disappearing. And, I am grateful that He made me realize before too late to enjoy my children. I just watched a home-made video of my middle daughter’s birthday and we had nothing on the table except, a home-made cake sloppily labeled with her name on it. But, the children were waiting with anticipation to eat the cake. And, they enjoyed it. The most important thing I saw in that video was health and the presence of all of us.

I learned that children may act like they want everything the world can give them and what their “rich” friends have, but at the end of the day, they always return to their mom for protection, healing, comfort, and wisdom. Though, I am a little short of the above, it comforts me to receive their hugs with love. I realize that being a mother is a privilege, not a burden.

Happy Mother's Day, my friend.

Father, thank You for the privilege of motherhood. Thank You for placing me in the company of joy, peace and love.